You’ve Got to Read Between the Lines

-The Significant Otter: “Listen here, mother fucker. I love you, but if you keep eating all of the crust off my stuffed crust pizza and leave the pizza part, I will kill you.”

-The Significant Otter made me go running with him the other day. Poor life choice on my part..His out of shape is VERY different than my out of shape.. stupid boys.

-He’s fighting off zombies while I watch Sailor Moon. We know what works for us.

-(After I like his status) Significant Otter: Stop stalking me! *To the cat* Not you, I love you.

-The Significant Otter: Dont “babe” me. It is either “Your Awesomeness”, “Sexy Man Panther”, or “Handsome Guy”

-“Can we get a bearded dragon? I’ll even let you name it Eddie. Eddie Lizard… EDDIE LIZARD, ERIN!”

-Got woken up last night by a slap to the face from a still sleeping Significant Otter, he says he doesn’t remember but I have my suspicions, I was probably snuggling too much and he wanted me away.

-Significant Otter: Erin’s coming home. Must buy all cheesy foods.


-Me *yelling into the next room*: I LOVE YOU

Significant Otter: I LOVE YOU MORE

Me: Aww, you didn’t tell me to fuck off

Significant Otter: Sorry about that, FUCK OFF


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